The ‘Cure’ for Pain.

The ‘Cure’ for Pain.

For the longest time, I would never talk about my pain. I would always keep it in, that it became my default setting. I remember watching a certain sitcom and a lady said, “…we take our feelings roll them into a ball and burry it deep.” Pointing to herself. It was a stereotypical joke about a group of people. Of course, I laughed it off I mean it’s a sitcom. But as I am writing this, I am thinking, that that just doesn’t sound right. Stuffing your feelings and emotions ultimately leads to deep seated pain. Which many times if not always when not dealt with results in terrible outbursts. For example, someone just randomly starting to shout at another person in public over a very insignificant issue. Or another hurling insults at another and they haven’t done anything wrong to them. Or someone doing something that they later regret because they had a very intense moment that they would have controlled, and stopped from spiralling into something unfortunate.

I have had my own public outbursts; I have answered someone rudely, I have had my moments of anger, irritation, overreacting or even making decisions that I later wondered, did I really have to? Or of thinking why did I even do that? Now I am learning to take more responsibility for my decisions by being intentional: If it is a bad decision, I correct and move forward and if it is a good decision, I reinforce it and also move forward. We are not defined by our decisions unless we stay there; life is not necessarily a destination, it is a journey.

Growing up, I always thought that I would be ignored, or judged if I talked about my feelings, thoughts and even pains, so I kept it in. I am still a work in progress in terms of expressing myself but hey even this article is progress, right? Most of the pain I had, I would roll into a ball and burry it in me, just like how the lady in the sitcom described Hehe… The problem is, it was starting to show up.  Some pain I have dealt with, some I am still dealing with and some I will deal with in the future. I am not a prophet of doom, far from it. But this is earth and at one point or another we fail as humans. None is perfect.

By dealing with pain, I don’t mean the toxic talk of, “you are an adult, grow up!” Not at all. This just results in more and more deep-seated pain, resentment etc.  It’s like popping a pimple every time it comes up and then another appears, instead of finding what’s causing it and dealing with it, then healing will begin.

People ‘deal’ with pain differently and I don’t mean personality wise I mean overindulgence. Rather than deal with it, we’d rather just look for something to numb it. Whatever it takes, not just to feel it. Some use drink, whichever kind; coffee, alcohol, some use sex, some are workaholics, etc. If you overdo something to constantly avoid another, that’s when it could become an addiction. You should be able to live life not controlled by things but dominating in your area of influence. Not dominating or controlling any person or being dominated or controlled by any person. Live life being content in every season; take note that I didn’t say settling but being content in every season meaning things don’t remain constant, they keep moving, so being equipped in every season.

The cure for pain is not to suppress it, it is to express it in a safe space. The best place is in therapy, journaling is also equally helpful, learning from those who’ve conquered what you are going through is also another good way especially if you apply. The cure for pain=not to suppress + to express in a safe space.

This Post Has 2 Comments

  1. Carson Anekeya

    The analogy of rolling feelings into a ball and burying them, as depicted in the sitcom, serves as a poignant reminder of the detrimental effects of suppressing emotions. The author’s acknowledgment of their own public outbursts and moments of regret adds authenticity to the narrative, making it more relatable to readers who may have experienced similar struggles. Great insight.

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