Its okay



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  • Post last modified:December 20, 2023
  • Post category:Health
  • Post comments:2 Comments
  • Reading time:4 mins read

I know most of us have beliefs on conditions, yes we  haven’t even gotten over stigma on HIV and now we have this fast rising sensitive issue called mental health, as an African , we do know what we say and believe  in the community or amongst. ourselves. 

‘You’ve never heard of the story of that family, hehe, lemme tell you their ancestors stole a chicken and haven’t apologized  and the were cursed that’s why they are all mad men’ .

“Men do not cry, why are you crying, you are a little girl” a disappointed loud sigh, Grace telling her husband who has just lost a job. 

“Don’t tell me you’ve never gone back to work, he died six months ago, you now being weak, mama gacheri”

“hehe, you have lost weight, are you trying to get a bikini body for your sponyo” 

“hehe , don’t tell me you paid 5k to see a therapist  , Mwangi, mwanaume ni ngumu  buana, utapata tu mdem mwengine”

Am sure these kind of statements are typical, we’ve heard them, told them and have been told . 

Sadly, there is still great stigma on mental health and has has alot of myths and conceptions here are some of them;

Men are allowed to grief , get depressed , cry. They also need emotional suppport when they are negatively affected by challenges like loosing a job, loosing someone they love. We ought to stop the culture of thinking men are rocks. They do breakdown as they are still humans. In the contrary we should encourage them to open up and assure them its okay to break down and talk to someone. It is not weak to get into depression. Its not weak to have an anxiety disorder. 

Everyone has their own ways of grieving, and it takes different periods of time, so we should not judge someone for grieving  for even a year just because you healed after 2months. Instead be close to them and encourage them.

Most of us as the gen z and millenial generation were raised by whips, and being called all sorts of names ,I know you can relate, haha. But as times changes, our children are  being exposed to the internet, we can’t judge  a 13yr old adolescent for getting into depression or addiction coz he/she feels neglected just beacuse the parent whipped them or tells the condesending words like “stupid”, its not their fault, for heavensake, they are watching other kids on the internet being corrected in a calm way and being encouraged when they do wrong, parents trying to have healthy conversations with their kids and rewarding them when they do right. So parenting styles have changed and we ought to adopt them . Listening to the views of your child is important, eg. if the kid insists he/she wants to change schools as they feel uncomfortable , listen to them, We were  not allowed to even talk so most people in the above generations ended up trying out drugs early honestly  and most of the youths ended up being alcoholics 

Okay another negative attitude we do have as Africans yes I said it , ‘Africans’, why do we look down upon women especially, who try to get out of toxic  and abusive marriages , mamas at the village would just encourage the wife to stay just because it will bring embarassment to the family if she leaves. These are among the factors that lead to people committing suicide, raising kids that are alcoholics, personality disorders ,  anxiety disorder and poor abilities in forming relationships with others. We as women should also encourage each other to love ourselves enough not just withstand being abused. 

Mentally ill people also deserve shelter, food, clothes and love . They are also humans and have human rights. We have NGOs and free government mental health facilities that take in mentally ill patients and rehabilitate them. Just because someone is addicted you don’t judge them and chase them away, give them small jobs , they actually do the best jobs  and also there are chiefs and community elders that can connect them to rehabillitation centres and they get better.  Addiction is a disease.



NB; People suffering from mental health disorders are humans and have rights. They are sick and deserve not to be treated less. 



Hey, its okay


This Post Has 2 Comments

  1. Carson Anekeya

    The acknowledgment of the impact of harsh disciplinary methods on mental health highlights the need for a shift towards more empathetic and supportive approaches, mirroring changing societal norms. Great insight.

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